The Security of Insecurity

by HEHFU

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1.
03:09
2.
03:41
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04:52
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03:39
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04:12
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03:27

about

A collection of home recorded songs dating back to 2013. The original plan was to re-record them with a full band in a studio, but for various reasons that didn't happen. After two years out dealing with my Mother's illness and subsequent death with Motor Neuron Disease and my own depression and anxiety issues, I've decided now is the right time to finally release these tracks to the public. Any money raised from this release or any of my other releases on Bandcamp will be donated to the MND association and St David Hospice, as both were there in my Mother's and family's time of need. Here's to you Mam, I think about you everyday.

credits

released October 4, 2015

All songs written, recorded and performed by Bradley Clarke
Cover art by Andy Hart

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HEHFU Caerphilly, UK

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Track Name: Flowers
I'll look for you
when the days are dark you'll get me through again
cute and friendly
you'll set my life on fire
and I'll hold you close
when the days turn into nights

We'd have a ball
I may be short but you'd make me feel so tall
and you wouldn't regret it
I'd give you my all
'cause a lonely life
is not a life at all

we'll watch our favourite bands
and see the sights from Wales to Japan
we'll watch tv
'till we fall asleep
my little princess
I hope you're more than just a dream

We'd have a ball
I may be short but you'd make me feel so tall
and you wouldn't regret it
I'd give you my all
'cause a lonely life
is not a life at all
Track Name: Winter Daze
Left behind
It's all fine
a golden touch
that I forgot
I'll see to myself
and drink to my health
christmas time
go fuck yourself

Rescue me
from the deep blue sea
and stop the sharks
from eating my heart

summer snow
and winter sun
I've mixed them up
what have I done?
My Broken Ears
My Frozen Mirrors
the disapoinment
re-appears

Rescue me
from the deep blue sea
and stop the sharks
from eating my heart

It feels so cold
In the winter sun
Track Name: Junk Heart
I want you to know that you are the one
I want you to see what you mean to me
I want you to know that you mean the world
I want you to see that you are my girl

'cause you are the one
(baby yeah baby yeah come on)

and when the stars come out again
they all shine together
I see a lot of us in them
yeah we'll shine forever
Track Name: 4 am
If you said forever
and that you were sure
then I wouldn't think that
that you didn't mean it

so complicated
I really hate it
so complicated

and if I said baby
yeah we'll be forever
then you would'nt think that
that I didn't mean it

and i lie here thinking
how did this happen?
and i lie here knowing
that you're gone forever

and i wrote a song for you
and the words are all so true
but i sing it out of tune
because i can't forgive you

and i lie here thinking
how did this happen?
and i lie here knowing
that you didn't mean it
Track Name: The Security of Insecurity
Like a boxer on the ropes
I punch above my weight
As I fall down, I hear the count of ten
My ego bruised
I won't get up
It's safe down here
And I've had enough
I'll stay down here and dream

I could try to tell a joke as you smoke in the garden outside
You might think I'm funny
I could try to steal a kiss to see if I'm a hit or a miss
You might think I'm sexy
I could make up a story about glory I've had in my life
You might think I'm clever
I could ask you how you are and how's your life with a confident smile
But maybe I'll just walk on by

Had my eye on the prize
But the prize got away
Maybe someday

I could try to tell a joke as you smoke in the garden outside
You might think I'm funny
I could try to steal a kiss to see if I'm a hit or a miss
You might think I'm sexy
I could make up a story about glory I've had in my life
You might think I'm clever
I could ask you how you are and how's your life with a confident smile
But maybe I'll just walk on by

Living life with regret
I'm guilty as hell
But if I smile long enough
It will all end well
Track Name: Love Relationship
watching daytime tv without a care
cause working's for squares
hung right over from the night before
you stink of cigarettes
I'm so sick of your attitude
it dilutes my mind
spoke about this so much before
a waste of my time

I'm so glad that we're together
love relationship
I hope we stay this way forever
you sank my battleship

I really like your dress
You like to look your best
I think you're really grand
with your fake tan
an orange stained pillow
all those ruined sheets
I'm glad we spent my money
on something for your feet

I'm so glad that we're together
love relationship
I hope we stay this way forever
you sank my battleship

it's you

our mistakes will last forever
didn't you know
Track Name: Catfish Tale
Maroon sky and a lowly sun
take me back where I begun
chilled breeze, empty morning streets
rub my eyes as I find my feet

And the things that you used to say
Are the things which I sometimes say
and the things which you didn't say
are the things that I wish to say

barking dogs and the cardboard shapes
deserted souls and the achy breaks
not on top, but underneath
find my eyes as I rub my feet

And the things that you used to say
Are the things which I sometimes say
and the things which you didn't say
are the things that I wish to say

two life's cut paper thin
too much glue now what a mess we're in
daisy chained just to keep you near
now I'm lost as you reappear
postcard plane thrown to my heart
together now but so far apart
blotted ink blue just for you
but what I write is never true

I think we better slow down
spending every night wishing for a brand new day

I should have known better
Than to follow you
I should have know better
but I never do

I think we better slow down
spending every night wishing for a brand new day

(stolen nights, pointless fights, time to get away)
Track Name: Stop or I'll Shoot
age has made me wiser
but filled my life with doubt
these artificial thoughts
have my brain all figured out
show your red lipstick glow
dance before my sleepy eyes
but i can never let you know
just to keep you on my side

so it's me and you again
I'll stick to you like glue
because I feel pretty nervous
what's a boy supposed to do?
yeah and If you feel the same
then now's the time to tell
because I can't do this again
and we started off so well

I should be a little bolder
and tell my dirty jokes
Glamorise vacations
it's all mirrors and smoke
but time forgot to stay
my days all went away
and when i think back to it now
please don't, just don't

so it's me and you again
I'll stick to you like glue
because I feel pretty nervous
what's a boy supposed to do?
yeah and If you feel the same
then now's the time to tell
because I can't do this again
and we started off so well

She said stop
or I'll shoot you down

so it's me and you again
I'll stick to you like glue
because I feel pretty nervous
what's a boy supposed to do?
yeah and If you feel the same
then now's the time to tell
because I can't do this again
and we started off so well
Track Name: A Perfect Life
a perfect hell
I'm glad that you know me so well
get drunk again
only way to fit right in

a perfect joke
loud people surrounded by smoke
last orders ring
bouncers snarl get out again

it's funny how life is
let's do it for the kicks
set our lives on fire
and all we do is laugh
and talk about the past
do it all again

a perfect smile
aint seen it for quite a while
peroxide hair
can't take you anywhere

a perfect life
eating dinner by candelight
those loving stares
miss them more than i wish to share

it's funny how life is
let's do it for the kicks
set our lives on fire
and all we do is laugh
and talk about the past
do it all again
Track Name: Day Break
Goodmorning too
these happy eyes are just for you
and they'll look out for the monsters who
drag you down
life can be so beautiful
and i believe you can conquer all

When the day is done
and you feel alone
when the day is done
it'll soon be back again

suggestions please
life goes by in a whirl of smoke
if you don't act now you'll likely choke
a whole new world
sometimes things seems impossible
just hit back hard and give your all

When the day is done
and you feel alone
when the day is done
it'll soon be back again

you're not alone

the sun will come

(the stolen Nights
the pointless fights
me and you should get away from here)

When the day is done
and you feel alone
when the day is done
it'll soon be back again